I just spent another day returning clothes that I bought for Layla that she will not be wearing. They would still fit her but most are winter clothes and she is not going to have to endure a Minnesota winter until next year. I have to say that buying little girl clothes has been so much fun! Makes me sad that I won't see her in so many that were my favorites but guess what...... I just bought some really cute spring and summer clothes!!!! Now I know there are those of you that do not like to shop??? But it happens to be a passion of mine. I do like a good bargain though.
Steve and the boys went to Grandpa and Grandma's this weekend so I plan to finish painting Layla's room. A friend is going to come and help me stencil on the top part of the room.
A Dream is a Wish your Heart Makes. Layla we dream of you and wish you were here.... Soon I hope.
Romans 8: 24,25
For in Hope we were saved. Now hope that is seen is not hope. For who hopes for what is seen? But if we hope for what we do not see, we wait for it with patience.
Friday, March 30, 2007
Tuesday, March 20, 2007
Good News, Bad news..Some hope.. No hope?
I try not to post when I am having a bad day because I don't want this to become a place that I only complain about the adoption process. But today I need to vent and it helps to write what I am thinking. I was told by our agency today that we may not go back to visit Layla again. Now, we were hoping that our next visit would be our pick up trip but at the rate things are progressing that is not going to be anytime soon!
The only thing that has kept me sane,(????) during this process has been to go and see our little girl and know that she is healthy and still knows her Mama.
Steve, on the other hand, does not want to go again until he can bring her home.
We had an incident when I left last time in which the foster mother said she was not getting paid and was sobbing that she loves our little girl but is worried about how to buy formula and diapers. Of course any parent is going to be concerned so I called our agency and informed them. To my suprise they said if they confront the lawyer , they will take Layla out of the foster home.
Well, our director confronted the lawyer and she says our foster mom is not telling the truth. She should win an academy award if she was lying.
I am frustrated beyond belief and just want our little girl home. She turned 9 months old today and never in a million years did I believe she would not be here with us by now.
I look at her picture and she reminds me that she is worth the wait!! She is Ours already, here or not here.
The only thing that has kept me sane,(????) during this process has been to go and see our little girl and know that she is healthy and still knows her Mama.
Steve, on the other hand, does not want to go again until he can bring her home.
We had an incident when I left last time in which the foster mother said she was not getting paid and was sobbing that she loves our little girl but is worried about how to buy formula and diapers. Of course any parent is going to be concerned so I called our agency and informed them. To my suprise they said if they confront the lawyer , they will take Layla out of the foster home.
Well, our director confronted the lawyer and she says our foster mom is not telling the truth. She should win an academy award if she was lying.
I am frustrated beyond belief and just want our little girl home. She turned 9 months old today and never in a million years did I believe she would not be here with us by now.
I look at her picture and she reminds me that she is worth the wait!! She is Ours already, here or not here.
Thursday, March 1, 2007
Coming Home
I called Steve from the Houston airport in tears.....there was a few left?? I only had an hour between my flights and my luggage was taking forever. Run Forest Run.... I was a streak going through that airport. I barely made my flight but I was almost home.
I got to the MPLS. airport and there were my boys...All three... with a rose for Mommy. What a great feeling to be back where I belong. If only our Layla could have been on that flight with me.
Soon, I hope, she will be coming to that same airport..... I will have dozens of roses waiting for her!!
I got to the MPLS. airport and there were my boys...All three... with a rose for Mommy. What a great feeling to be back where I belong. If only our Layla could have been on that flight with me.
Soon, I hope, she will be coming to that same airport..... I will have dozens of roses waiting for her!!
Pick yourself up, Dust yourself off and move on...
The day has come for me to give Layla back to her foster mom....something I hadn'-t planned on doing. I am not sure if I had no tears left, or I realized that no matter what we have to go through, that this little girl is worth every minute of it. I also realized how much her foster mom loves her, which makes it easier to leave. Add the fact that I miss my boys terribly and I am ready to go home. Baby Girl, Mommy misses you already!
Devastating News
We really had hopes of our case getting signed off while I was in Guatemala. Steve was going to meet us down there to bring Layla home. We had been in the final court (PGN ) since November and our director kept saying any day now. Well our hopes and dreams were dashed away when we found out that we had been kicked out of the final court for some mistakes on our documents. The birthmothers identification card had a mistake on it that needs to be corrected. So now our lawyer has to make the corrections and put us back in PGN where it will be another 6'-8 weeks added to the process. This is by far the toughest thing I have had to deal with in a long time. I spent the next 2 days crying and Steve would try to console me over the phone but he wasn'-t doing much better. Our baby girl will be at least 10 months when she comes home.
Life in Antigua
I have to say that I was so lonely the first couple of days that I did not think I would make it. Then my wonderful neighbors who are missionaries from the U.S. studying Spanish invited me to supper and my landlords daughter from the U.S. befriended us. I also met a couple of other moms that were fostering their children and we would get together at the park and hang out.
My first week was wonderful just getting to know our little girl. She is not only beautiful, but a good sleeper, a laid back, joyful, happy little girl. I called Daddy and the boys to update them and let them know I missed them. Funny thing is the boys were usually too busy to talk to me.
My first week was wonderful just getting to know our little girl. She is not only beautiful, but a good sleeper, a laid back, joyful, happy little girl. I called Daddy and the boys to update them and let them know I missed them. Funny thing is the boys were usually too busy to talk to me.
Excited and Scared to Death
Well I did it! I was scared out of my mind to get on that plane and go by myself but I did it! I have traveled to Guatemala 8 times before but always with Steve or my good friend Denise. I told Steve that I wasn't sure if I should thank him for letting me go or be upset because he let me. I am writing this after the fact because I had no internet in Guatemala.
I can't explain the excitement of knowing you will be seeing your child soon! The night before without sleep and getting up way before necessary because you are so anxious to see that little face again. It has been 4 months since I have seen Layla.
I was at the restaurant having breakfast because she was not supposed to be at the hotel until 10:00 a.m. when I looked up and there she was!
She looked just like Layla, only a little bigger than the last time.
After some good instructions from the foster mom, we were off to Antigua, about an hour drive, to our apartment.
I can't explain the excitement of knowing you will be seeing your child soon! The night before without sleep and getting up way before necessary because you are so anxious to see that little face again. It has been 4 months since I have seen Layla.
I was at the restaurant having breakfast because she was not supposed to be at the hotel until 10:00 a.m. when I looked up and there she was!
She looked just like Layla, only a little bigger than the last time.
After some good instructions from the foster mom, we were off to Antigua, about an hour drive, to our apartment.
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